Remus Lupin has a Secret
by Avahin
Summary: that is not, as Lily Evans, James' ever-loving girlfriend has suggested, being a werewolf. No, James has decided that it is something else. RL/SB


Remus Lupin has a secret. And it isn't, as Lily Evans has so nicely suggested, that he is a werewolf. James Potter pauses in his thinking.

"How did you know that?" he asks his recently made girlfriend with great hostility.

She frowns back at him before turning her nose upwards and away from him huffily. "Remus happens to trust me enough to tell me. Besides, I found out in our third year," she answers with a bit of pride that James takes as a challenge.

"Well we found out in second year." He has successfully upped one on her. James now feels complete and has forgotten what it was he had been thinking about until Sirius Black sinks down in between the couple with a heavy sigh. Why it is that Sirius Black has suddenly reminded James Potter of Remus Lupin is simple: Sirius Black is his best mate and Remus Lupin is his other best mate. Peter Pettigrew follows the later very closely in terms of best mate-ness. The only one to surpass any of the three is his one true love, Lily Evans, who at the moment seems to be rather upset. James Potter blames that not on his own stupidity, but rather on Sirius' who has now started raving about Professor McGonagall and the most recent detention.

"-and then she had me sort the files in her cabinet in _alphabetical order_!" he shrieks as his hands fly up ever-so-dramatically. "ALPHABETICAL ORDER!" he cries again as if it were the worst thing to happen. Which is untrue. The worst thing to happen would be the creation of Severus Snape, but James, being too busy trying to remember why he had been thinking of Remus Lupin, decides not to voice this fact.

"At least," a soft voice cuts in before Sirius can fill them in on the horrors of yellow parchment and thinking, "she didn't ask for chronological order." A tired looking face smiles sympathetically and sarcastically at the same time as the equally fatigued body settles down in the red couch across from them. The soft voice, tired face, and fatigued body all belong to the werewolf who goes by the name of Remus Lupin. The same Remus Lupin who, as James has deduced, has a secret.

"Moony!" the nickname by which they address Remus Lupin. "Where have you been?" These enthusiastic greetings have come from Sirius Black who has come to realize that neither James Potter nor Lily Evans is interested in what he has to say.

"Studying like you should have been," the tawny-haired boy responds as he releases the bag that has been weighing down on his shoulder.

Sirius snorts before he launches himself next to Remus. "I had detention. It is not my fault at all that I was unable to study or do my homework," he explains as he tugs away the book Remus has taken out to read for fun. Then he holds it upside down like a five-year-old trying to decipher a chapter book. Deciding it too hard a read, he tosses it aside and holds on tight to Remus to keep him from going after the book.

"Padfoot!" another clever nickname for the Sirius Black. "I was reading that!"

"I know," Sirius replies, rather pleased with himself.

"But," Remus' brilliant golden eyes (not that James would know that they were brilliant; he's only heard them so from Lily, Sirius, and fifty other girls) start to waver, "my aunt gave it to me for my birthday and you just _tossed_ it aside."

Immediately, James sees that Sirius has become guilty. He knows this scene too well. Sirius will look up at Remus with wide grey eyes that will suddenly darken before quickly glancing to the side like a little boy caught doing something wrong (or, as Lily has kindly pointed out, like a bashful schoolgirl. James dismisses this idea, because Sirius is one of the most manly men he has ever met. Lily then crosses her arms until James apologizes). Then Sirius will gnaw on his bottom lip, all the while making sure Remus is watching, because it's pointless if Remus isn't watching, and mutter how sorry he is. To which Remus will sigh and say,

"It's fine, Sirius. Please let me go pick it up now."

Sirius lets go of Remus, who uncrosses his legs and dips behind the couch to retrieve his book, and grins mischievously. He winks quickly at James and Lily just before Remus pops back up and hides his book in his bag. Then he turns to Sirius and indulges the seventeen-year-old boy in what he has been looking for the entire time: attention.

--

James has forgotten, once again, what he has been thinking of, because Lily has decided to snog him quite senseless. And, James is alright with that, because, honestly, who wouldn't want to be snogged senseless by a beautiful redhead whose face is slightly dusted with darling little freckles, approximately one-hundred and twenty of them actually.

Suddenly, she stops and James groans, because why would one ever want that beautiful redhead to just _stop_ doing wonderful things with her lips and tongue. He moans this time and she slaps his arm.

"Duties," she informs him as she drags him to his feet and pushes him out the door they locked awhile ago.

"Must we?" he whines though he provides no resistance. He is, as Sirius Black so often reminds him, whipped.

"Yes," she sighs back before she taps him lightly on the forehead with her pink-glossed lips. His own lips are probably glossed pink, but he doesn't bother to fix that. He rather likes having the world know he is Lily's and Lily is his. "C'mon," she whispers softly into his ear and he tags along behind her like a lost puppy.

Puppies. Sirius Black. Remus Lupin.

"Remus has a secret," he announces again.

"You've mentioned this already, James," Lily reminds gently as she links her hands with his while they walk down the corridors, not really looking for anything, because there are still fifteen minutes until curfew.

"I know," he says, "but what is his secret?"

"Have you tried asking him?" she inquires with a silent laugh hidden behind her lips.

"Well," James frowns. "No." He wonders why he hasn't asked Remus yet. Luckily, the boy in question hops, or rather walks, into view and James flags him down. "Moony! What's your secret?" he shouts across the wide expanse of students.

Remus' face blanches and flushes at the same time, which is really quite an amazing feat, and he somehow ends up looking like a porcelain doll. "J-james," he stammers so cutely that, if he were a girl, James would have ravished him on the spot…not that James would ever admit to that. "You know my secret." It is clear that Remus is confused as to what James is trying to do. Both Lily and Sirius, who has suddenly appeared out of nowhere, notice this. They pull away James and Remus respectively.

"What were you trying to do?" Lily hisses at him before shrieking in surprise as James lands his lips on hers to spare him the lecture and to reassure himself of his manliness.

"Trying to find out his secret by asking him, obviously."

Lily sighs and tries to figure out why she ever agreed to dating this moron. Then he pulls her into his arms in a soft embrace and she melts.

--

"R-really?" Peter asks as James tells Peter about Remus' secret. Or rather, about the fact that Remus has one. "Well, maybe-"

"I've already asked him," James cuts in quite suddenly, though he never actually asked Remus in private what his secret is."

"I just thought that maybe-"

"He's not dying," James interrupts and Peter looks quite frustrated.

"What if-"

"His family is fine. I just owled Mr. Lupin last night and he responded quite happily and even sent us a couple of Mrs. Lupin's homemade chocolate cookies." James grins for he has already eaten all those cookies, not sparing any for his friends. Especially not for the one who is keeping the secret from him.

"Really? Can I have some?" Peter asks eagerly.

"Focus, Wormtail," James snaps and Peter knows James has none to give. "What is this secret of Remus'?"

"Maybe," Peter begins as he notices James is finally listening, "Remus is keeping it a secret for a reason and he doesn't want us to know."

James stands up suddenly. Telling Peter has clearly been a bad decision. Of course, Peter would not want to delve into the mystery that is Remus Lupin. He groans and shakes his head. "Seven years, Wormtail. We've all been friends for seven years."

"Well, some secrets are meant to be kept," Peter offers insightfully.

"Not this one," James decides before walking away from the tree that is already nearly bare. "Not this one."

Peter decides not to follow James and to continue throwing bits of bread into the lake for the passing birds to peck up. However, when the Giant Squid reaches a tentacle up and wraps it around a particularly plump bird before pulling it underwater to devour, Peter supposes it's time to get up and run back to the castle.

--

"Hmm," Sirius intones thoughtfully as he strokes his recently shaved face. "Hmmmmmmm," he hums again with more emphasis. "Our Moony is hiding something from us?" he ponders of James as he peers down his nose.

"Haven't you noticed it?" James asks, ignoring Sirius' high-and-mighty position. "He's very…" James pauses. There actually hasn't been anything off about Remus. In fact, he has been oddly, "relaxed."

"Isn't that a good thing?" Sirius' body relaxes visibly, and James had no idea it was tense in the first place.

"Well, yes, it is," James frowns. There are no signs pointing to Remus' keeping a secret, but James just _knows_ he is. "But he's definitely hiding something from us, Padfoot."

"Hmm," Sirius began again and James whacked him on the head with his fist.

"Bloody stop that, will you?"

"Never!" Sirius cackles as he thumps James on the back and dashes for the door. He yanks it open and clashes into the body of Remus Lupin, who then falls back against the wall and barely manages to regain his balance before he falls down the flight of stairs he has just climbed.

"Bugger," he says from the landing. His body is all spread out and several limbs are twisted at odd angles. A bruise is forming at the top of his forehead and somewhere on his body is leaking blood. Sirius, James, and Peter are all staring down at him with their eyes wide and mouths agape. It isn't until Remus asks in a strained and pained voice, "You know where I'd like to be right now?" that they spring out of their dazes and rush forwards as he answers himself, "The Hospital Wing."

--

Sirius is sitting with his head in his hands and his elbows propped up on Remus' bed. He is muttering his "sorry"s, though Remus has told him that he's perfectly alright and it's not Sirius' fault at all. By now, Remus has given up telling Sirius that and is ignoring Sirius in favor of the chocolate basket on his bedside that his three friends have put together just for him. Remus will not openly admit this, but he loves the three of them. Actually, Remus will openly admit this, because he thinks that perhaps this is the secret James has been so worried about lately.

"You know," he begins and makes sure all three pairs of eyes are on him before he continues, "I really do love you all." His voice is soft because he is afraid of sounding like a pouf, but when one says "I really do love you all" it's hard _not_ to sound like a pouf no matter how quietly you say it. Of course, Remus must continue with his declaration of love or else it simply sounds ridiculous. "You all do so much to help me and make my life easier. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you three for my friends. I don't think anyone else would become Animagi for my sake, or visit me every time I come to the Hospital Wing, or make me chocolate baskets, or stay by my side at night when I can't fall asleep." Remus has refrained from making personal confessions, but James doesn't remember ever doing the last. Clearly, Peter doesn't either, but Sirius, on the other hand, seems near tears. Which is strange, because Sirius has only ever cried twice in all the years James has known him. "I don't deserve you guys for friends, but thank you for being mine anyway."

Sirius has burst into silent tears, but quickly hides this by burying his head in the white bed sheets. James decides that Sirius also has a secret, but this is not the time to delve into that. Instead, he tells Remus, "If you don't deserve to be ours, then we are not worthy of the good being that you are." He waits until Remus smiles back sweetly before launching the question onto him. "So what's your secret?"

Remus looks rather surprised, but James notices his quick glance down to Sirius. It must be a secret that the two of them are sharing, James decides. This is why Sirius had been "Hmm"ing earlier that day.

"Isn't that what you wanted to know?" he asks, innocently. "What secret are you talking about, Prongs?"

"The one you are keeping from us," James specifies poorly.

Remus looks absolutely bewildered. Luckily for him, Madam Pomfrey has finished with her other patients and is coming to put the finishing touches onto Remus. She deems it necessary to kick the other three out before she can do so. Remus promises to come find them as soon as he is done, but he looks only at Sirius' red-rimmed eyes as he says so, and suddenly James feels out of place.

--

Sirius has decided not to speak until Remus comes back from the Hospital Wing, which, the teachers find, is a delightful surprise. They are finally able to complete a lesson without any interruptions and everyone is very cheerful as they descend the stairs to the Great Hall. Everyone except for Sirius Black, James Potter, and Peter Pettigrew. Lily Evans finds that even her sweet beautiful kisses are not enough to make James happy. They are, however, good enough to make him make moaning noises, but she cannot tell if he is moaning from pleasure or from stress. She prods him and he begins to talk. After about half an hour, during which she has removed herself from his lap and has decided to lounge in Remus' bed, because James' wild gestures were about to maim her, he finishes his story and Lily grins.

"Isn't it obvious?" she asks, though clearly this is only something that is obvious to the female gender. "Remus' secret is the same as Sirius' secret. They love each other."

James gasps rather comically, and, if it were anyone else, Lily would have thought he wasn't being serious. "That's ludicrous." Lily groans. "Why wouldn't they tell me that if they were?"

"Maybe because they haven't told each other?" she suggests and sighs as James shakes his head.

"Sirius would have told me _something_ though, wouldn't he have?" he asks with uncertainty, and Lily goes back to his side and wraps her arms around him comfortingly. It's always very nice to see James in such a vulnerable state.

"Well, you have been pretty busy lately," she responds before kissing him gently to prove her point.

"Still," he mutters back against her lips.

"They'll figure it out soon and they'll tell you," she reassures him with another kiss.

--

When James next sees Remus and Sirius together sitting next to the common room fireplace and playing chess, James realizes the truth behind Lily's words and wonders why he ever dismissed her in the first place. Of course, he will never tell her this, because then she will just triumphantly say, "I'm always right" and that always puts James in a sour mood.

But anyway, James settles down next to the two of them and only Remus acknowledges his presence with a nod. Then again, Sirius has a legitimate excuse not to notice; he is busy trying to get his queen out of a corner while trying to get her to stop screaming at the same time. James decides not to offer his advice, because his advice would be to sacrifice the queen, which is what Sirius is clearly trying to avoid. Instead, he watches Remus as Remus stares with the gentlest look on his face at Sirius. His lips are turned upwards into a smile that's about to break into laughter. His eyes are twinkling with mirth and something softer. His hair is swept back behind his ear, but a few strands slip forwards, giving his head a strange warm glow.

Sirius groans and looks away from his queen. "Pawn to F4," he says with defeat. Remus doesn't have to utter the words; his knight takes the queen before facing the king that was hiding behind the beheaded piece.

"Checkmate," he says confidently as he places his hands behind him and lean back against them.

"Good game, Moony," Sirius grumbles as their pieces mend themselves to their best ability and cross back onto the board. James turns to study Sirius' surly face and finds that it is the opposite of Remus. His mouth is turned downwards but their corners seem to be resisting an upwards tug. His silver eyes are lined with content and defeat. His hair is messily tied back. Where Remus seems to represent the sun, Sirius personifies the coming night. Opposites that both belong in the same place.

"Prongs?" Remus asks, seemingly not for the first time. A calloused palm swing back and forth in front of his face. "Everything alright?"

Sirius snorts as he directs his pieces back into their box. "He's probably thinking about a recent snogging session with Lily."

Remus raises an eyebrow merrily. "While staring dazedly at you, Padfoot? You must have some amazing power. Either that, or you're so boring, Prongs can only combat that with images of Lily."

Sirius crosses his arms huffily and his pieces take the opportunity to rush forwards and attack Remus'. "I'll have you know that I have one of the most interesting faces on the face of the earth. It's so amazing and intricate that scholars can spend ages on it and still not map it all."

"And who would want a map of your face?" Remus asks in return as he attempts to shoo off Sirius' pieces.

"I know for a fact that plenty of people would buy a map of my face." Sirius does not help in the separation of their pieces.

"Will you to just go at it already?" James bursts out suddenly, even though it has absolutely nothing to do with anything.

"Pardon?" Remus asks in his calm manner as Sirius shouts, "What?"

James looks back slightly mortified at what he has just said. But he is a Marauder, and Marauders never go back on their actions, no matter how stupid. "You heard me," he says. "Just go into a closet and snog or whatever it is blokes do with other blokes."

"I'm sorry," Remus responds because Sirius is too red in the face to say anything, "but why would we do that?"

"Well," James splutters, "because you two are in love with each other."

Remus laughs lightly; it's clear his heart isn't in it. All the same, Sirius stands up suddenly and bursts out of the common room, disrupting the portrait of the Fat Lady as he does so.

Remus looks after Sirius with great confusion. He also looks as though he would like to run after Sirius and sort things out, but he cannot sort things out if James does not first explain what is happening. He looks at James.

"That's your secret, isn't it?" James answers, knowing Remus' looks by heart.

"I-I suppose," Remus answers. The truth is that this cannot be his secret because Remus has not actually come to this conclusion yet. He has, however, already come to the conclusion that he likes Sirius. "How did you-"

"Lily helped me."

"Oh." That makes sense. Remus did mention to Lily that he fancied Sirius. "Will you excuse me then?" he asks as he stands up with his eyebrows furrowed and his face pulled into a long frown.

James feels as if he has done something terribly wrong. Remus' sudden dashing away confirms that. James gets up soon after to find Lily, because Lily will tell him that everything is alright after telling James what an idiot he is.

--

Sirius comes up to him the next day when they are alone in the dormitory and pulls James into a tight hug. As soon as James can take in just a bit of air, he asks what the occasion of the hug is, and Sirius winks at him.

"Can't a man hug his best mate for no reason?" Sirius asks before he skips away rather like a girl in love.

In love. James grins and races after Sirius. He doesn't need Lily to figure out what this secret is.

--

A/N: Admittedly, _not_ one of my best. I agree, there is not much happening in here. I just felt like something a bit lighter. :)


End file.
